How to Stalk People

1) Social Networking Sites- If you're too lazy to manually get up and crawl by someone's window.
Twitter's like, the easiest way to stalk someone. There are constant updates of what a person's doing. Twitter tells you where the person is, what he/she is doing, who whom, etc.

If you have a Twitter, prevent the stalkeriness (a kind of celery) by being a social outcast- don't post anything, and go back to playing Club Penguin.

Facebook is also easy. A person, can stalk you- looking at your photos, at the background, so they know where you were, and with whom, and what you're doing. Even the most obscure thing, a picture of you in your bathroom. Stalkers see your bathroom, and that Teletubbie towel you have hanging on your shower rack. They see how you have your stuffed teddy bear next to the toilet to make sure you're not scared when you "go." They see that chainsaw you use to make sure murderers aren't hiding behind your shower curtain. Stalkers also see your status updates, when you post 3201381298491281 a day to gain attention from your friends.

How do you stop this? Block your privacy settings so no one- not even the account that you made for your pet porcupine can even look at your Farmville account (that you play when you're feeling glum and it's snowing outside. Or every day. Same thing.)

That's just one way, and only two social networking sites (I USED A BIG WORD! "SOCIAL"). So don't be stalkerededed. It's not good. That's how your bike, Ophelia, get's stolen. Be a social outcast and curl up in fetal position every time someone says the word "brown." HAVE FUN! :D

DISCLAIMER: Desk Forts is not liable for injury, a reputation for dinosaur hunting, an addiction to glue sticks, or well...anything.

Question: Is there a positive word for "sad"?